I've been sitting here and came across something I wrote about Emma when she was six months old. She's now 1 1/2. I can't believe how mush she's grown since then! I still feel the same way, maybe I feel even stronger on some things. But this is for everyone, mainly Emma to see. Here it is:
I got my angel to sleep, I love her more than life. I never knew how much my life would change once she entered it. I don't know if you know but she was a surpise, but what a wonderful surprise she was. I would never give her back. I remember when she was born how quickly my thoughts went from me to her. I still remember laying there asking Neil if our baby was ok and begging my mom to let me see her because I knew she was in the room but I couldn't hear or see her and I just wanted to see my baby. I remember seeing her for the first time five hours after she was born and just crying and begging them to let her stay with me. I remember seeing her for the first time in the hospital and never wanting to leave her sight again. I remember having to say good-bye to her that night and crying while the nurse grabs me tissues and my mom assures me that everything will be ok. I remember the nurses telling me that if I would've waited twelve more hours that I wouldn't have a baby at all. I remember going to bed that night and pleading to my Heavenly Father that she would have a quick recovery becuase I knew that she wasn't supposed to be in the hospital, but instead with her family who loves her. I remember the day we brought her home and I rode in the back with her and just stared at her the whole way home thinking to myself, "how could such a perfct thing come from me?" I remember the first time she smiled and me, I mean really smiled and how much joy that brought into my life, I remember her first laugh and how cute and innocent it was. Everyday I stare at her in awe at how beautiful and smart she is. I can't believe she is already 6 months old! I don't want her to grow up. I miss my little 5 pound baby, now instead I have a 13 pound baby, but I love her more and more every day. Emma remember that your mommy loves you so much and I always will. You are the light of my life. I will never stop loving you.
Emma is no longer 13 pounds, but 20! Ok so apparently that's not that big, but it's big for me. I love watching her grow, and at the same time I hate it. I want another baby so much, but I need to trust my Heavenly Father and know that when the time is right he will bless me with another one of his miracles. Hope you enjoyed this...it's more so I can always remember these feelings that I have. I love you Emma Love.
Love,
Mommy
